(CNN) -- For the first time in history, women are better
educated, more ambitious and arguably more successful than men.
Now, society has rightly celebrated the ascension of one
sex. We said, "You go girl," and they went. We celebrate the
ascension of women but what will we do about what appears to be the very real
decline of the other sex?
The data does not bode well for men. In 1970, men earned
60% of all college degrees. In 1980, the figure fell to 50%, by 2006 it was
43%. Women now surpass men in college degrees by almost three to two. Women's
earnings grew 44% in real dollars from 1970 to 2007, compared with 6% growth for
men.
In 1950, 5% of men at the prime working age were
unemployed. As of last year, 20% were not working, the highest ever recorded.
Men still maintain a majority of the highest paid and most powerful
occupations, but women are catching them and will soon be passing them if this
trend continues.
The warning signs for men stretch far beyond their
wallets. Men are more distant from a family or their children then they have
ever been. The out-of-wedlock birthrate is more than 40% in America. In 1960,
only 11% of children in the U.S. lived apart from their fathers. In 2010, that
share had risen to 27%. Men are also less religious than ever before. According
to Gallup polling, 39% of men reported attending church regularly in 2010,
compared to 47% of women.
If you don't believe the numbers, just ask young women
about men today. You will find them talking about prolonged adolescence and men
who refuse to grow up. I've heard too many young women asking, "Where are
the decent single men?" There is a maturity deficit among men out there,
and men are falling behind.
This decline in founding virtues -- work, marriage, and
religion -- has caught the eye of social commentators from all corners. In her
seminal article, "The End of Men," Hanna Rosin unearthed the
unprecedented role reversal that is taking place today. "Man has been the
dominant sex since, well, the dawn of mankind. But for the first time in human
history, that is changing—and with shocking speed," writes Rosin. The
changes in modern labor -- from backs to brains -- have catapulted women to the
top of the work force, leaving men in their dust.
Man's response has been pathetic. Today, 18-to-
34-year-old men spend more time playing video games a day than 12-to-
17-year-old boys. While women are graduating college and finding good jobs, too
many men are not going to work, not getting married and not raising families.
Women are beginning to take the place of men in many ways. This has led some to
ask: do we even need men?
So what's wrong? Increasingly, the messages to boys about
what it means to be a man are confusing. The machismo of the street gang calls
out with a swagger. Video games, television and music offer dubious lessons to
boys who have been abandoned by their fathers. Some coaches and drill sergeants
bark, "What kind of man are you?" but don't explain.
Movies are filled with stories of men who refuse to grow
up and refuse to take responsibility in relationships. Men, some obsessed with
sex, treat women as toys to be discarded when things get complicated. Through
all these different and conflicting signals, our boys must decipher what it
means to be a man, and for many of them it is harder to figure out.
For boys to become men, they need to be guided through
advice, habit, instruction, example and correction. It is true in all ages.
Someone once characterized the two essential questions Plato posed as: Who
teaches the children, and what do we teach them? Each generation of men and
women have an obligation to teach the younger males (and females of course)
coming behind them. William Wordsworth said, "What we have loved, others
will love, and we will teach them how." When they fail in that obligation,
trouble surely follows.
We need to respond to this culture that sends confusing
signals to young men, a culture that is agnostic about what it wants men to be,
with a clear and achievable notion of manhood.
The Founding Fathers believed, and the evidence still
shows, that industriousness, marriage and religion are a very important basis
for male empowerment and achievement. We may need to say to a number of our
twenty-something men, "Get off the video games five hours a day, get
yourself together, get a challenging job and get married." It's time for
men to man up.
